Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
