My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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