Its about making memories worth repressing
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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