Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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