...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
