I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
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Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
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she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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