Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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