oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
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