Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
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