"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
