She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
How's work?
Spinning.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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