I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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