She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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