Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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