no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize