Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
