Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
