We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
