Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
