When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Come share oat with me in your robe
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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