HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
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