I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize