You really coming over, don't trick.
She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
