He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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