haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
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there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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