But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
