I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Randomize
