do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
