no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
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