its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
True college students do jello shots in the library
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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