Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Randomize
