Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
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