FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
