i will never coherently bang her
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
