My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Randomize
