I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
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