People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
