i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
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