Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Randomize
