No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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