You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Randomize
