in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
