found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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