We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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