Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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