when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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