awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
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So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
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its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
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