yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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