She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize
