i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
